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EFT - Avoiding Childhood Issues

Many people find themselves avoiding working on childhood events and issues. These are some “why”s I hear from clients:

  • That was so long ago. I’ve already dealt with that in therapy.
  • I don’t see what it has to do with me now.
  • I don’t remember much about my childhood. Let’s work on current issues.
  • I’ve gone back to my early 20s. Isn’t that far enough back?
  • I should be over all that by now. I just want to tap on what’s bothering me now.

Darn Good Reasons

Sometimes the reluctance is really fear masquerading as logic. Your protective inner self (who’s doing a great job, by the way!) is scared it’s too painful to go back there. So it creates this avoidance with some darn good reasons.

Or sometimes the resistance is from just not knowing – not realizing how much more helpful it can be to go as far back as you can with EFT.

So Why Bother?

Here’s the deal: Clearing childhood issues can have a larger positive impact on your life than probably anything else you can work on with EFT. It can hugely reduce the time spent tapping on your problems as they show up now. The positive impact of working on early issues shows up in ways you’d never imagine.

To read more about this, click here.

Let’s hear what your experience is with this. Leave a comment any time.

EFT - Eliminate Your Resistance to Using It

So you’ve tried EFT and it works really well for you. But you’re not using it. You intend to. You want to. But somehow you’re not getting around to it. Sound familiar?

Use EFT to Use EFT More Often

You can tap on your resistance to using EFT. You don’t have to analyze it to make use of it. You don’t have to know why. If you do, that’s great — you can tap on that issue, too. But you can just get started in a really easy way.

Keep It Simple

Just follow the usual steps for EFT, focusing on that resistance as your issue.

When Tapping Doesn’t Occur To You

Sometimes you don’t even think of EFT as a solution to feeling crummy. You just get caught up in the worry, the anger, the sadness — whatever negative emotion. Tapping hasn’t become a habit yet. It’s only in hindsight that you think, “I could have tapped on that!”

There Is A Solution
There are two ways you can help yourself to have EFT pop up as an option to feeling bad:

  1. Tap in a daily affirmation at a regular time each day.
  2. End every EFT session you do with positive statements about using EFT.

To get the whole scoop on how to do this, read more …

Tapping to Release Limiting Beliefs

EFT is great for releasing negative emotions and physical problems. Did you know you can use it to let go of beliefs? Beliefs that are holding you back?

If there is a part of your life NOT working the way you want it, you probably hold beliefs that are interfering. These might be about your work and how you approach it. Or maybe they interfere with relationships. Possibly they affect your health.

Here are some other places to look for limiting beliefs:

  • What are you afraid of or nervous about?
  • Consider what you want to do, but can’t get started with.
  • Where do you feel resistance to moving forward?
  • What is always a struggle for you?
  • Where in your life do you have to force yourself to do something?
  • When is follow-through a problem for you?

Read on for more about the how-to…

After Your Session - Getting Grounded

Do you ever feel a little out of it after doing EFT? You’re down to a solid zero in emotional intensity, so you know you’re done with the issue, but you’re not quite back to present time reality?

It’s Different for Everyone

We each finish a session in our own way.  Some people feel perfectly normal. But you might be a little sleepy. Some clients say they feel “checked out.” And others feel kind of “floaty.”

That’s no problem if you have endless free time and no responsibilities. But what if you have kids who need you? What if you’ve got an appointment to get to, or work to get back to?

There Is A Solution

You’ve got options to ground yourself back in reality. Here are some to consider:

  • Wait it out. You will return to normal — it’s just a matter of time. So if you’re in no hurry, this is a good choice. The tricky part of this option is that your waiting time might vary depending on how intense your session was. For some people, if they’ve cleared a really big issue they take longer to get back down to earth. I think of it in terms of the juicier the issue, the more energy you shift, and the more after-effects you may feel. But I confess — I don’t know how this works, really. I’ll leave that to the researchers.
  • Do breathing exercises. First, set an intention to come back to right now. Then breathe deeply and slowly. Breathe in THIS time on THIS date, in THIS chair at THIS address in THIS city – fill in those actual details. As you breathe out, feel yourself settling in and claiming your spot right here, right now. Try doing that 7 times and then check to see how you feel. (If you’re more lightheaded, you’re breathing too fast.) If you’re not quite where you want to be, continue with 7 more breaths.
  • Walk mindfully. That just means to walk with full concentration on the walking. Feel your feet hit the ground with each step. Feel your body moving as you walk. Focus on the physical sensations of the walking itself. Imagine that you’re making a deep footprint with each step. If visualizing helps you, picture your impact reaching down hundreds of feet into the earth.
  • Use other practices. If you have other kinds of resources that help you, use those. I won’t go into the how-to’s, but here are some ideas: You can focus on balancing your root chakra. Ask for spiritual assistance in getting grounded. Do appropriate qi gong or yoga movements.

Take Good Care of Yourself

Just be conscious of what your own pattern is. Then do what you need to do for yourself.  You really do need to be grounded to drive. Or even to fix dinner. When you’re not fully present, it’s easy to accidentally hurt yourself by tripping, bumping into something, burning yourself, cutting yourself, or whatever.

There’s no need to suffer any of those things as a part of your EFT experience.  Tapping is for healing — right?  So make the whole thing positive by taking responsibility for yourself afterward, too.

Can you recommend another way to ground yourself?  We’d sure like to hear about it.

Let me know if you have any questions or suggestions for other topics.  Love to hear from you any time.  Whatever you do, keep tapping!

EFT for Physical Problems

Tapping is a great way to deal with physical problems — whether it’s pain, illness or injury.  Maybe you’ve tried this and it hasn’t worked really well for you.  Or maybe it worked, but only as a temporary solution.  If you’re not satisfied with your results, here are a few things to consider.

Only a Symptom

Is your physical challenge chronic (you’ve had it for awhile) or connected to a bigger problem?  If so, you can probably get some relief with EFT.  Just tap on the pain, tension, fatigue or whatever you’re feeling right now.  Be specific about the location in your body — for instance, the back of your right shoulder.

But that relief may not last.  You might be free of the problem for a few hours, or a day, or maybe even a week.  But it may return.  That’s when you want to look further.

What’s the Core Issue?

You’ll likely get lasting relief by using EFT on the issue that physical problem is connected to.  You have a choice here.  You can contact a practitioner to help you with this — or you can work on it yourself. 

Sometimes there’s an emotional event that caused the physical problem.  Tapping on what happened may clear the problem showing up in your body.  For instance, you realize your headaches started the year you left for college.  Go back and tap on the feelings from that time and the other events surrounding your big transition.  You may be through with headaches!

And sometimes there are emotions that flared up at the time the problem started.  Those feelings caused blocks in your energy system that are hooked to the physical problem.  And they’re keeping that problem hanging around.

Say you’ve had knee pain ever since that car accident.  Go back and tap away the aspects of the wreck — the fear, the anger at the other guy, the inconvenience of doctor visits — the whole shebang.  It’s possible that you can clear the blocks that have kept your knee from healing itself.  You might never have knee pain again.

I’m Not Sure How To Do It

For some more detailed instructions, check out my article on the topic: EFT for Physical Issues.

What’s your success with physical problems and EFT? Let’s hear about it!
Do you have tapping questions I can answer or topics you’d like to know about?
Are you finding these EFT tips helpful?

I’d love to hear from you. Just leave a comment below, or shoot me an email any time. Whatever you do, keep tapping!

Holidays Are Here! Are You Ready?

It’s December and the holidays have begun.  Yesterday, Muslims around the world celebrated Eid al-Adha — and celebrate the Islam New Year on the 29th.  We’ve got Hanukkah coming up on the 21st.  And folks who honor the winter solstice will celebrate that same day.  Then Christmas comes on the 25th, followed by Kwanzaa on the 26th.  And New Year’s Eve rounds out the month on the 31st.

What a party!  The whole world celebrates during December.  Little kids look forward to this month all year long.  Do you?  How’s it going for you this month?  Was Thanksgiving a nice appetizer for your winter holidays?  Or maybe it stirred up some worries, frustrations or sadness about approaching holidays.

Be Emotionally Prepared

Even fun things can be an emotional strain sometimes.  The planning, the anticipation, the hopes — all that can build tension.  And let’s face it — celebrating takes time and energy.  If you’re short on either, your feelings can end up out of balance.

If you’re NOT looking forward to some aspect of the holidays, that can be a real drain, too.  You can even find yourself resenting others’ happiness.  Or maybe just getting cynical so you don’t have to feel pain or sadness.

Nip It In The Bud

Tapping is such a simple remedy.  You don’t have to wait until you snap at someone, or find yourself on the verge of tears.  Just use EFT when you see the first sign that something’s bothering you.  Trust yourself.  You can do it! 

The Full Monty

Take some time out in a quiet place and do EFT on any big thing that’s bothering you.  Take your intensity level all the way down to zero.  That time you take to completely clear your issue will pay off for you throughout the season.  And its effects will flow out to other people around you, because you’ll act differently.  So don’t shortchange yourself. 

If it’s financial concerns, tap on that.  If it’s missing somebody for the holidays, do a session on that.  If you think you’ll never get it all done, use EFT for that. 

Sometimes holidays shine a light on issues that are there all year ’round.  Like money concerns, grief, envy — those big ones.  You can still just zero in on the holiday part of that issue.  Just stay focused there, and trust yourself to clear those blocks. 

Then commit to yourself to come back to that larger concern — either on your own or with a practitioner.  The point is this:  Just because you’ve got a big core issue you haven’t healed yet, it doesn’t have to spoil your holidays.  You can tap on the holidays part of it and clear that right now.

Day-to-Day  December

Stay on top of those little things that crop up.  Out in crazy traffic, tap at the stoplights.  Standing in a long line?  Tap away your impatience.  Are you trapped by Uncle Ernie again, whose had 3 too many?  Or is Great Aunt Lorena going on and on about her last operation?  Use EFT to get through it. 

Put Your Hands To Work

You can tap in your lap.  Just use one hand to tap against the side of the other hand — your karate chop point. You’re tuned into the issue, so don’t worry about a set-up. Just start tapping. Silently say your reminder phrases to yourself. Then affirm some good stuff, tuning into the joy and love of the season.

Or finger-tap with one hand.  There are tapping points on each of your fingertips.  On the side of your fingers that’s closest to your thumb, right at the side of the nailbed.  Use the thumb of that hand to tap on the inside of your other fingers on that hand, one by one.  Standing?  Put your hands behind your back and finger-tap.  Sitting?  Put your hand down on the seat beside you on the side away from the person you’re sitting with.  Then finger-tap away!

All Kinds of Options

You don’t have to resign yourself to a season of tension.  It’s totally possible to enjoy your holidays this year.  Try the methods above, and cruise through December.  You CAN enjoy yourself.

If you want some extra help, check out Holiday Stress Relief: The EFT Guide To Your Best Holidays Yet!  You don’t have to figure out what to say or how to tap — the eBook and audios are complete EFT sessions for you to tap along with.

Whatever you do, take good care of yourself.  And EXPECT to enjoy this season.  As always, I would love to hear from you.

Do you have any questions?  Comments?  EFT topics you want to learn about?  Just leave me a comment or email me any time.  And keep tapping!

EFT On Your Own — Jump Right In!

I hear a common fear from clients and students — that they’re afraid to try tapping on their own. Maybe you’ve got some of this same hesitation. It might be for different reasons.

Let me address a few of these. Hopefully, after reading this you’ll feel more sure of yourself and be willing to give it a try.

I’m Afraid I Might Do It Wrong

You can’t really do EFT “wrong.” There are ways to tap that get better results than others. That’s true. But you can’t really do it wrong. Follow EFT scripts you’ve printed out to get the idea. Or listen to your Stress Relief audio you downloaded for free when you signed up for my newsletter. Another option: click on EFT-The Basics and print out the instructions for yourself.

I Might Hurt Myself Somehow

EFT only works with the energy that’s in your system. So you can’t put in something that’s not there. True…you might bring something to the surface. But you can’t install something that doesn’t belong. So you can tap along with anybody’s tapping script. If their words don’t fit your life exactly, no big deal! It’s impossible for you to create a new problem by tapping about it.

I Don’t Even Know Where to Start

Start anywhere! What’s bugging you? What’s distracting you from what you want to do? You can tap on that. You could even start with your fear of tapping on your own. Try this:
Setup

  • Even though I’m nervous about doing EFT myself, I love myself anyway.
  • Even though I don’t have a clue about what I’m doing, I accept myself and I want to give this a try.
  • Even though I’m afraid to trust myself because I’m new at this, I respect who I am and I want to move forward.

Tapping first round

  • This tapping concern/fear/worry

Next rounds

  • I don’t know what I’m doing.
  • I’m afraid I’ll goof this up.
  • I’m not a practitioner.
  • I can’t do this myself.
  • What if I cause myself problems?
  • I want to let go of these fears.
  • I’m ready to take a chance.
  • I’ve got this tool right here and I want to use it.
  • I’m choosing confidence.
  • I’m feeling calm about this.
  • I choose to make it easy.
  • I’m willing to trust myself.
  • I give myself permission to take a risk.
  • I’m choosing to move forward now.
  • I’m ready to go!

Finish Off with Positives

Thank yourself for your courage. Tap in some affirmations that you DO know what you’re doing. And you want to do this again. Affirm that you get better at EFT every time you do it.

Good for you! Let me know how it goes. I’d love to hear from you. Do you have other doubts or questions? Just ask…

Until next time, keep tapping!

Tapping Combination Plate: Mix It Up!

EFT as the Main Course

EFT is great as a stand-alone practice.  There’s no doubt about it.  But you can use it to boost all kinds of other activities, too.  The possibilities are limited only by your own imagination.

Tapping as the Appetizer

You can use EFT to clear any resistance before you do something you’re reluctant to do.  Maybe it’s going to the gym.  Maybe it’s heading into a weekly meeting.  Or getting started on a project, making a phone call, answering emails…

Or you can simply tap in affirmations to boost your confidence or willingness.  Just take a few minutes, even if it’s in the restroom at work, or out in the parking lot.

EFT as a Side Dish

When you’re doing any kind of energy work, EFT can seriously enhance it.  It’s a great tool to use while you’re getting acupuncture.  Just finger-tap while you’re on the table.  Zero-Balancing and Healing Touch are two other kinds of work that lend themselves to this.  Finger-tap while you’re doing any kind of self-healing work — from working out, to getting chiropractic, to visualizing.

Tapping as Dessert

Tapping in a positive experience can ramp up its good effects.  Just do some EFT with affirmations AFTER anything you get good results from.  Affirm how great you feel, how confident you are.  Tap while you congratulate yourself for overcoming fears or hesitation.  Affirm how much better your body feels.  Tap in your certainty that you’re getting healthier, stronger, more loving…whatever!  My clients tell me that this not only feels great, but makes the thing easier to do the next time. 

No Big Thing

So tapping doesn’t HAVE to be some huge deal.  By just using EFT in little ways in your daily life, you can get so much benefit.  You don’t have to change your clothes.  You don’t have to take a shower afterwards.  You don’t need to set aside an hour.  Just work it in with the rest of your life.  Piece of cake!

Keep me posted on how you’re doing with your tapping.  I’d love to hear from you.  Do you have any questions about EFT?  Just ask –  I’m glad to answer any time.

Whatever you do, keep tapping!

Affirmations with EFT

Using EFT is an easy way to ramp up the strength of your affirmations.  Some people say it’s like doing “affirmations on steroids.”  It’s a really powerful practice, however you look at it.

If you’re already saying affirmations, it takes no extra time — just add tapping.  If you’re NOT saying affirmations as part of your self-healing, why don’t you consider it?  It feels really good and can be a great way to add to your other practices.

Affirmations are simply positive sentences.  They can be reminders of good things that are already going on for you.  Or they can be about something you intend to have. 

State them in the present tense — the now.  Begin the sentence with “I …”  An example is, “I easily use EFT everyday to help myself.”  Another is, “I’m taking loving care of my body, mind and spirit.”

Some people think EFT is only good for clearing out unwanted emotions and beliefs — those negative blocks.  It’s the best tool on the planet for that. 

But it’s also great for watering the seeds of your positive beliefs and goals.  That’s where the affirmations come in.  If you’re using Choices in your EFT practice, you’ve already tapped in some affirmations.   Experienced or not, you could start using affirmations with EFT right now.  

Here’s how you do it:

  • Choose some affirmations to use.  Write them yourself, or borrow them from another source.
  • Write or type out your list. 
  • Choose a permanent location for the list so you can find it.  You could post it by your mirror, keep it with your journal, keep a copy in your Day-Timer or glove box — be creative!
  • Read your list out loud while you tap. 
  • Say your affirmations with enthusiasm.
  • Move around the tapping points.
  • Change points at the end of a phrase or an affirmation.
  • Super-charge your lsit by including some gratitude statements.

Tapping in affirmations is a great way to start your morning.  It’s also a good stress-reliever if you find yourself all wound up during the day. 

For double benefit, make it a twice-a-day thing and do it in the morning AND evening.  But here’s an important note:  Some people become more alert from tapping.  So don’t do EFT just before bed, unless you know it’s not a problem for you.  Tap in your affirmations after dinner.  Or during your evening walk.  Or even during a TV commercial break.

I hope you’ll give this a try.  It feels so good!  And let me know how it works for you.  I’d love to hear your experiences and comments.  Or if you’ve got an EFT question for me, ask it!

Until next time….keep on tapping!

EFT in your own voice

EFT is designed to give you emotional freedom.  And it’s a quick route to reach that destination.  There are two ways EFT gets you there:  through tapping and through words.

Tapping follows certain maps of points.  Words follow certain patterns.  But inside those patterns, you’ve got lots of options.  So choose the option that works best:  Your Own Voice.

What do I mean by that?  I mean use your personal words, your own phrases.  And if English is NOT your first language, use your first language.

Here’s why:

Feelings have thoughts that go with them.  Thoughts are made up of words — your words.  The energy blocks that EFT removes are connected to those feelings, thoughts and words. 

They got parked in your system in your language.  Your everyday words.  So back them out (with EFT) the same way you parked them — with your words.

Here’s how:

  1. Trust yourself.  It doesn’t have to be perfect.  Just try it and see what happens.
  2. Modify EFT scripts from EFT practitioners to fit your words.
  3. Leave therapy talk and healing language for your other practices.  Your subconscious doesn’t talk in those words.  Your inner self speaks and thinks in everyday language.
  4. Call feelings what you call them.  Here are some examples of options:

Anger:  Do you feel mad, frustrated, annoyed, furious, pissed off, outraged, or bugged?

Fear:  Do you feel anxious, nervous, worried, scared, jittery, tense, or concerned?

Sadness:  Do you feel bummed, blue, depressed, down, heartbroken, or gloomy?

You get the picture.  Use your own expressions and phrases while you tap.  And if you swear when you’re angry, swear when you tap on that issue that had you angry.  Let it out the same way it got lodged in there.

Results

Personalizing your own EFT will help you release issues more quickly.  Your system has one less kind of resistance in its path to healing. 

So give it a try and let me know how it goes for you.  Do you notice a difference?  I’d love to hear from you.

Until next time, keep tapping!